The Blog | Bob Cesca: That One May Smile, And Smile, And Be Cheney | The Huffington Post

My tables -- meet it is I set it down,
That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain"
Ever since last week's State of the Union, the image of Vice President Cheney's maniacal smile during the president's energy remarks has haunted me. I've spent a lot of time documenting the president's inappropriate smiling ( and ), but there's something really spooky about the vice president at the State of the Union.

Watch the video . He couldn't stop smiling. It's as if a small, slow-moving, flightless bird was stapled to the president's back -- gasping for breath and waving for help with its tiny malformed wing.

Physically retarded prey makes Vice President Cheney smile harder than the First Lady after the rods in her hydraulic grinning apparatus are recalibrated.
However, the most likely reason was, of course, that the vice president knew the president's words were bullshit.
In an effort to soften his already gelatinous image, President Bush outlined a set of goals designed to make him sound as if he's concerned about oil consumption and global warming.

The epicenter of the president's earth-shattering strategy is to reduce gasoline consumption by 20 percent over the next 10 years. What he failed to mention in his Twenty-in-Ten plan, according to the , is that it's based on gas consumption projections and not today's numbers. In other words, gasoline consumption would still be significantly greater in 2017 than it is today.

And the vice president's crooked, Penguin-y grin begins to form.
Let's say you weigh 300 pounds and your doctor instructs you to lose 20 pounds in 10 months. But he inexplicably bases that weight-loss goal on your non-diet projected weight 10 months from now: say, 400 pounds.

You could literally batter-fry and digest both Rush Limbaugh and your choice of McDonaldland characters (Grimace looks the most edible, and, coincidentally, most resembles Mr. Limbaugh) and still meet that 20 pound reduction goal of 380 pounds, but you'd still weigh 80 pounds more than when you started. Thank you, Dr.

Bush, for the best diet ever.
The president also outlined a renewable fuels plan, but never mentioned one of the administration's A-list alternative fuels (not "clean-burning" -- just "alternative," the noted). This unmentionable fuel happens to be derived from the president's favorite thing ever: coal.

The coal-to-liquid process converts coal into gasoline -- gasoline that would produce twice the global warming emissions without any reduction in fuel economy, according to the Public Interest Research Group.
Hilarious! Someone check the video tape for VPOTUS pee puddles on a dais!

Ethanol and grass sound greener, but, , there isn't enough of either to meet the president's goals. That's where coal-to-liquid gasoline comes in, the Times says.
I'm shocked that Vice President Cheney didn't snarf his beverage during this portion of the address.

As it turns out, several of the vice president's favorite things ever are involved in the coal-to-liquid business.
Favorite things like Shell Oil, Bechtel, Nazi Germany, apartheid and Sasol. What's ?

It's an oil company that borrowed the coal-to-liquid process from Nazi Germany (which used it for the Luftwaffe) and perfected it in apartheid South Africa. Sasol, as it turns out, is the present-day corporate name of the former apartheid South African state-owned energy department. And we all know about the vice president's support of South African apartheid.

Meanwhile, the Houston-based corporation DKRW Energy just inked a to build a coal-to-liquid plant in Wyoming, the vice president's home state. Oh, and DKRW Energy was founded by four former Enron executives, including who was President Bush's Secretary of the Army from 2001-2003.
To you and me, the administration's remedies have always seemed ridiculous and deceptive -- invading Iraq to fight terrorism; the Clear Skies initiative; No Child Left Behind; and this latest .

But in the minds of President Bush and The Penguin, however, their deeds make perfect sense in the context of their unspoken schemes -- schemes which bear little resemblance to rational solutions. Perhaps the president and the vice president can't help but to see the comedy in what they've been able to get away with all these years. And however incompetent they may seem by conventional standards, they're certainly excelling at this level of deception.

Knee-slappers for them, a slap in the face for us.
UPDATE: was just posted on the front page here. A choice quote:

"Thirteen percent of U.

S. citizens said they had never heard or read anything about global warming, the survey said."

It could really be funny if we werent talking about REAL LIFE/REAL LIVES...

..
I swear Cheney reminds me of Al Pacino as he played the Devil Himself in the Devils Advocate.

...

By: Hopeforpeace on January 29, 2007 at 07:59pm
Flag: [ ] The scope and extent of the criminal conspiracy which has been perpetrated in our midst by so-many people in our own Government ...

not only in the Executive Branch but elsewhere ...

will be the subject of disbelieving historians for the next one hundred years.
How did it happen? How did we let it happen?

How large and how pervasive did the conspiracy turn out to be?
When Ike Eisenhower spoke that prophetic warning to us all in 1961, did he comprehend that one day his own Successor would be a key player in an audacious scheme whose goal was not only to steal several trillion dollars' worth of oil but also to steal hundreds of billions of dollars from the American people at the same time? Could he have considered that, when a great American city was devastated, that a full year later nothing has been done .

. but these same criminals callously managed to divert several billion dollars' worth of "relief" money into their own pockets, and then do nothing?
"There are none so blind as those who will not see.

" By: sundialsvc4 on January 29, 2007 at 08:03pm
Flag: [ ] " A cutpurse of the empire and the rule, That from a shelf the precious diadem stole, And put it in his pocket." - Hamlet By: citizenofreality on January 29, 2007 at 08:23pm
Flag: [ ] Cheney's grin is for all to see, "heh..

.you can't touch us!" By: TRYKER on January 29, 2007 at 08:23pm
Flag: [ ] Villains!

" I shrieked, "dissemble no more! -Edgar Allen Poe
Yes, Wolf, we have had "enormous successes in Iraq"
Sure they have, if their intention was to rape and pillage and control the oil, which of course it was. As distressed as I am that it took so long, I am grateful that the public is finally waking up.

Please, Please - IMPEACH!
I have heard several politicians say they don't think they want to put the country through the stress of impeachment! AAAGGGH!

That would be a cakewalk compared to the stress of seeing these people lie and steal and cheat and not have anyone stop them! At very least - family values people..

.hello? WHAT DOES THE ADMINISTRATION"S EXAMPLE TEAC?

H OUR CHILDREN?
Lie, cheat, steal, greed is good, be hypocritical, don't give a flying fuck about anyone but yourself..

.great values, thanks Republicans. By: cranbot on January 29, 2007 at 09:05pm
Flag: [ ] Glad to see that I'm not the only one to notice Darth Cheney's manner as little george spoke about his little energy plan.

By: DMM on January 29, 2007 at 09:06pm
Flag: [ ] Fact is, we, the citizens, are the ones responsible for this. To continue to blame is to continue to be in the victim mode. I think it is a perfect time ( long overdue) for a discussion of democracy and what is required to make one work.

By: buddlea on January 29, 2007 at 09:17pm
Flag: [ ] From the Hamlet references to the Burgess Meredith references, an outstanding piece of bloggery, Bob. Greed, greed, and more greed, that's what drives these fellers, and that's really, really it. I'm weary of all the political-psychological-spiritual analysis of BushCheney motives, when, let's face it, it all comes down to how much money they will personally make.

They are no different than the characters on the Sopranos.
The only thing this blog was missing was further references to President Bush's favorite flick, Lucky Number Slevin, or, as I hear he likes to call it, "the Slevinator" as in, "Uh..

.honey, I'm just gonna hang out and watch The Slevinator again with Turd Blossom and his boy Gannon." By: jumpypants on January 29, 2007 at 09:27pm
Flag: [ ] The asshole Bush wants us to cut back on using foreign oil at the same time he wants to double the oil reserves.

Did you notice that the price of oil jumped on that asshole's comments. We should not use or buy the fuel, but he wants to. He also flies Air Force One that uses thousands of gallons of fuel, every day,.

...

.nice going asshole! By: lyn on January 29, 2007 at 09:29pm
Flag: [ ] Why wouldn't he be smiling?

Do you have any idea how much money Halliburton makes literally every second of Cheney's War?
What do you think the cunning facial expression of being lubricated just to the point of feeling no pain might look like?
If you knew you were held to be as fondly regarded as a root canal by the entire populace, wouldn't you want a little something to bolster having to sit behind Blight Bush ?

After all, what does The Vice have to lose? He gets to have a facade of all the perks of power, although the real power is now eroding by the second, he's rich enough to think of himself as being worth billions, and most of all he has the bankable solace of knowing that he and his money are untouchable.
Even when his yet unborn grandkid reaches Cheney's present ripe old age, the damage Dearth Cheney has wrought on so many aspects of America will only be halfway to being fixed.

I keep thinking of all the retired military and Washington retirees that devoted their lives to the prosperity of the country that was handed over to this monster. Now in their final days, they get to witness the United States coming undone. And so will we.

Cheney will sooner or later , clutch his chest. But what's already been done is so massively deleterious, maybe he's smiling because he has accomplished the ultimate fait accompli.
To be the fiddler that burnt Rome and still hold the position of concertmaster.

It was Cicero who alerted the Senate to the consequences of the lack of leadership and publicly held Mark Antony to account for running Rome into the ground.
Cicero did that at the cost of his own safety, his wealth and at the risk of bringing down the government he had spent his lifetime perfecting.
Knowledge which is divorced from justice, may be called cunning rather than wisdom --Cicero
New York Times LEAD TUESDAY: Bush executive order gives president much greater control over rules to regulate public health, safety, environment, civil rights, privacy, other issues.

.And may I say a no good congress! By: lyn on January 29, 2007 at 09:52pm
Flag: [ ] Lately I've been screaming, "Baker Act Bush," but, clearly, Cheney is the real Dr.

Demento here ...

the lunatic mind at work. Up to his ass in blood money and happier than a pig in shit about it. By: SeeingRedFeelingBlue on January 29, 2007 at 09:53pm
Flag: [ ] That second paragraph is too hilarious.

I don't know what's better, the suffering bird line or the recalibration of Laura's hydraulic grinning apparatus. I too was struck by the griining Vice..

..alas, while watching I was only creative enough to surmise the third paragraph.

...

.he couldn't contain his glee because he knew every conservation-related word was utter bullshit. By: dhick9 on January 29, 2007 at 09:54pm
Flag: [ ] Damn,.

.. I hate it any time the Vice-President is smirkier than the Chimpanzee masquerading as our President.

Jesus F. Christ,..

. when are the bozos we have elected to Congress going to see enough of this crap to actually put the idea of impeaching Cheney and his Hand-puppet / President back on the flipping table? By: drkazmd65 on January 29, 2007 at 10:04pm
Flag: [ ] No way Bob, he's the RED SKULL or LEX LUTHOR all-the-way, baby.

Yes, I agree as to why he had his shit-eating grin. It's because he knew they were telling the WORLD to "go fuck yourselves." They apparently get their jollies from this, as the pathological are wont to do.

Good Hamlet quote, except we know he scowls too. OK, I'm edging towards the Penguin a bit more now. So, where the fuck is Batman, Superman, Spiderman, or Wonder Woman?

I know, Wonder Woman is tying Robert Downey jr. up, but Jesus..

.
By: DeepThroat on January 29, 2007 at 10:06pm
Flag: [ ] Yeah, I saw that smile
By: beaver on January 29, 2007 at 10:07pm
Flag: [ ] If you believe that the Bible is true, Cheney will spend eternity in Hell. If you're an agnostic/atheist (I'm liking "agnatheist") you can still be certain that consequence will follow, as historians will eventually ferret out and document his misdeeds and their negative effects.

Both Cheney and Bush will have a permanent legacy as the two worst of all our elected leaders, and with Spiro Agnew and Andrew Johnson for competition that's a real accomplishment.
Justice and punishment don't always appear in a timely fashion, or, as with OJ, through the court system. While I'd like to see them both imprisoned, I may have to be content to watch them publicly shamed.

By: bringiton on January 29, 2007 at 10:24pm
Flag: [ ] How is it that three hundred million people allow such a few monsters ruin this country? By: lyn on January 29, 2007 at 10:36pm
Flag: [ ] The hydrocarbon law is pure cheney. By: gotalife on January 29, 2007 at 10:39pm
Flag: [ ] I know exactly what that smile is.

My father has that smile (a former high-ranking military man and now a cop). I see it on his face all the time and it makes me want to smack him. He and Cheney and Bush have the same smile.

Sometimes Bill O`Reilly too. It's the "You're the scum of the earth, a fucking dumbass and I'm only going to tolerate your existence until I don't feel like doing so anymore." It's a power smile.

It only comes with complete, unbridled, unchecked power. It makes me nauseous. By: neamhni on January 29, 2007 at 10:45pm
Flag: [ ] Cheney's Captain Hook grin goes along with never having to say he's sorry.

Apparently, a complete lack of conscience, even in the face of incompetence and abject failure, makes one uncommonly cheery. I'm convinced if anyone overheard the senior members of the Bush Administration ranting on a NYC bus, they'd be summarily rounded up and brought to a ward in Bellevue to attend group therapy sessions with other delusionals professing to be Churchill, FDR or in Cheney's case, Napoleon. By: helloise on January 29, 2007 at 10:58pm
Flag: [ ] 'Why, Sir, a man who talks nonsense so well, must know that he is talking nonsense.

' By: misterb on January 29, 2007 at 10:59pm
Flag: [ ] gala: remember what happened to Cicero. It's gonna happen to us. Bread and circuses MUST win the day.

Kinda hurts down deep. (How many people would have marched on Super Sunday?) By: gopogossum on January 29, 2007 at 11:36pm
Flag: [ ] After Bush choked out the words "global climate change" both he and Cheney had to take a drink of water.

When I watched the speech again on CNN later they cut it so that you could only see them putting down the glasses at the side of the frame.